We simply have to CHOOSE to be happy. If you're serious about living the rest of your life with reduced stress, for better mental health, and more happiness, you need to detox! In this article, I share five fool-proof tips on how to do just that!
1. Disassociate from, and Avoid Negative People.
Who we keep in our circle affects how we think and feel. Do you have that one friend who is always negative about everything, and seldom has a good word to say about most anything or anyone? Although you may not actively participate in that behavior, the bad energy from the attitudes of these kinds of people is in your universe; they're rotten seeds planted in your subconscious.
How about that family member who tells you that you're not good enough. Or, you can't do this, or you don't know how to do that? Not an encouraging word to be found. It's okay to tell them how this makes you feel. It's also okay to distance yourself if that negative speak continues. This is about YOU being happy, and being YOUR best self. Yes, family is everything, but remember, they are to you, what you are to them, so if you aren't getting that positive respect, there's nothing wrong with limiting the visits you have with that person(s).
Let's face it; it's difficult to be happy when the negative voices are there mongering fear and hate, and trying to keep you down.
Do this instead:
Surround yourself with positive people, and influences. For example, meet new people who might have the same interests as you. Follow your favorite blogger, or follow and interact with someone who inspires you, on YouTube (I find this to be so much fun). Read inspiring books, and watch movies and TV-shows that make you laugh. And music--we have to remember music; it's therapy! Dance, dance, dance!
2. Measure Yourself Against Yourself; Not Others.
Think the grass is greener on the other side? The Jones' are in the same socio-economic bracket as you, but seem to have more? Becky seems to win every contest she enters, but you get no love? So what; who cares? We don't know what the Jones' really did to get the fancy cars, jewelry, and vacations. Perhaps they worked several jobs and saved up their money. Maybe they ran numbers. Or, hit the lottery! Perhaps you have more responsibilities than they do, or maybe you just make better decisions about what you spend your money on. How about that?! It's quite possible that to Becky's 100 tries, you've only tried 10 times. The more you try, the more your chances at winning. Or, could it be that Becky did something else (that I won't name here) for her wins?
The point is, comparing yourself and your life to others' can destroy your self-esteem and hinder your growth. Remember what is for you is for you.
Do this instead:
Remember, there's always going to be someone else who has more, or who is better at something than you. This is the case for all of us. So, mind your own business. Be your own competition, and elevate to be YOUR best SELF. Set a goal, then measure your growth in that area. Note what you accomplished, the steps you took to get there, the obstacles you overcame, and the great things you've done during the journey.
This makes you feel good, lifts your esteem, and validates you. You can still win when you make YOURSELF the focus.
3. Focus on the Positive Details in Life.
3. Focus on the Positive Details in Life.
As I mentioned earlier, there's always something in life, aiming to drag us down. Yes, there are times where we need to allow ourselves a moment to get through a rough patch. What we do with these tough situations is what determines our happiness & low stress future. Consider and learn from these obstacles, and heartaches, grow from them, and then move on. Dwelling and wallowing for extended periods of time is counter productive. You need to get over this quickly, so that you're back to a positive place, and are ready to handle the next "situation" that life is sure to bring. Remember; there's always going to be something.
Do this instead:
Do this instead:
It is a skill, but with a little practice, you'll be a pro. Accept that sh$% happens; things are as they are, and there is good and bad in all of it. Ask yourself, "How can you turn this negative into a positive?" This process allows you to begin to let "it" go, so that you can make a fresh batch of lemonade drop martinis.
Shifting the focus off of your problem, to help someone else, is another way to lift your spirits, AND the person you're helping. You are giving of yourself, coming to the aid of another. This is, in part, what life's about. Great energy all around!
4. Focus on the Present, for it is a Gift.
See what I did there?!
Are you a list keeper? Do you jump into the "way back machine" and recount petty, insignificant, inconsequential bullsh%$? Do you sit, in fear, about the what ifs of what the future will bring, with absolutely no supporting facts to substantiate those fears?
Well, stop that!
Do this instead:
Be here, now, so you can enjoy what is wonderful in the present. Sure, it's practically impossible to not remember the past, because you learn from it. It's equally difficult to not think about the future, because you want to plan for it.
However, understand and accept that those things can't change, and you have no control over them. You have enough to do as it is, like stop right where you are, look around, and marvel in the joy that pretty wallpaper is bringing you...NOW. Or, the humor you're getting out of that sitcom you're watching. Or, even better, the yummy yummy goodness you're tasting from that ice cream sundae you have in front of you. So-called small things add up. Focus on, appreciate and be grateful for what you have NOW.
5. Keep it Simple Sweetie.
People make life more complicated than it is, primarily in relationships, which adds unnecessary stress. The lack of communication, and assuming a person should know how we feel about something, although we never told them, is flat out unfair.
Our minds are also cluttered with the meaningless "stuff" we love to accumulate. This can reek havoc on our mental, and simply weigh us down.
We can create new habits to keep our lives simpler, happier, and relatively stress-free.
Do this instead:
Live simply. One way to start is by communicating. Ask clear questions. This is so much easier than mind-reading and assuming. It not only saves time, it reduces unnecessary conflicts, misunderstandings, and negativity.
Also, purge; get rid of everything that you haven't used or worn within the past year, and donate gently used items to charity. This goes back to being of service and helping others. By the same token, remember to get a receipt, so that you can write off the donation on your taxes; this is also about building a better YOU, which includes being financially sound so that you can continue to give.
If you take nothing else from this article, remember the keys are to FOCUS on, and APPRECIATE all that's GOOD with you. We're all unique and great in our own way; keep that in mind before comparing yourself with Becky. Also, BE KIND and of service to others; you will feel great about helping someone else, and inevitably, the universe will reward you.
Below are a few more tips that fill your space with positivity, even in the subconscious. They're easy to do, and are sure to help you on your journey to living a happy and stress-free life:
1. Smile more. (Why not? You got this.)
2. Literally hold your head up high. (You're proud of who you are and you're great at it!)
3. Give thanks for all that you are, and all that you have. (No mistakes were made here.)
Get started now, and put these steps into action. Save this post to your favorites, and come back to it when you need a reminder. Feel free to share this article with others who may need a boost in living a happy and stress-free life.
You got this!
T. James-Sykes
Subscribe via Email
If you take nothing else from this article, remember the keys are to FOCUS on, and APPRECIATE all that's GOOD with you. We're all unique and great in our own way; keep that in mind before comparing yourself with Becky. Also, BE KIND and of service to others; you will feel great about helping someone else, and inevitably, the universe will reward you.
Below are a few more tips that fill your space with positivity, even in the subconscious. They're easy to do, and are sure to help you on your journey to living a happy and stress-free life:
1. Smile more. (Why not? You got this.)
2. Literally hold your head up high. (You're proud of who you are and you're great at it!)
3. Give thanks for all that you are, and all that you have. (No mistakes were made here.)
Get started now, and put these steps into action. Save this post to your favorites, and come back to it when you need a reminder. Feel free to share this article with others who may need a boost in living a happy and stress-free life.
You got this!
T. James-Sykes
Subscribe via Email
